bar + crowd + crete — i keep a diary

Here you can see Michael hi-fiving his friends ("And then I told them to fuck off before I kicked their American asses!") while my dreamgirl chats with her friend about how she wishes her friend would stop coming between her and her future husband.

european vacation part 14: the buddha cafe.

October 27, 2003

Crowd shot.

european vacation part 14: the buddha cafe.

October 27, 2003

DSC03940.jpg

original not copied to this machine yet

Buddha Cafe, the first place we popped into, was booming. But as we'd been told, we'd arrived in Crete about a week past the end of the "tourist season" and excluding a few people that we managed to pick out as fellow travelers, 98% of the people there were Cretan (the photo above represents the one, small clique of foreigners we saw out that night).

So concerning the locals, the first thing you should know is that Cretan women are among the prettiest I've ever seen in the world. Seriously, we were blown away. Here's the breakdown: 80% of them are drop dead gorgeous. 10% of them are just regular gorgeous. And the remaining 10% are maybe a little funny in the face, but they've still got ridiculous bums. Which brings me to point number two: 100% of Cretan girls have badonkadonk, J-Lo, pornstar asses. When viewed from the side, all of their bums look like the letter C. We nearly lost our tiny minds. We were like how could we not have heard about the asses here? Which brings me to the last point about Cretan girls: 100% of them wanted to have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH THE FOUR OF US.

Chris talked to some of the local boys in Greek and then he explained to us that because Rethymnon is a tourism town, it's apparently taboo for the local girls to be interested in visiting boys because all the local boys will think she is a slut and won't want anything to do with her. *sniffle*

I Keep A Diary Productions proudly presents a new movie soon to be sweeping theaters everywhere: I DANCE ALONE! Starring:

european vacation part 7: first day in crete!.

October 24, 2003