Remember when those black pore masks came out and everyone was going nuts about them? I think I bought this stuff off Instagram. I was excited to try it out...
This is the face of man who in the midst of having a great time at 4am is suddenly worried about waking up in time to catch his international flight the next morning. (Spoiler alert: Didn't make it) Eh, worth it! Happy birthday, Siege!
When we got to the doctor's office, they gave me this face mask to wear! Remember back two years ago there was a big panic about swine flu? They had just started quarantining people and I was worried that they weren't going to let me board our honeymoon plane to Bali if I was running a fever!
My friend Amy K has a "no photos after 4am" policy. I always used to chastise her for being a baby, but now that I'm looking at this picture of myself throwing up "hip hop hands" while wearing a vulture mask that's timestamped 4:47am, I'm beginning to see where she's coming from.
I tried to get Vin to wear it for a picture and he was like "No way, if anyone sees a picture of a brown guy in a bio-warfare mask, the terror alert status is going to increase. Fuck that." Hahahaha.
While packing my room up on Tuesday, I came across this crazy-ass Israeli bio-warfare mask I'd purchased from an army surplus store back in 2000 to use when had to sand the old paint off the walls of the loft we converted in Brooklyn.
After icing my angry toe, I donned the lovely Gemma's sleep mask and slipped off to Nigh-nigh land to dream of slutty Essex girls and homeward bound airplanes.
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