i keep a diary

December 31, 2001

New Year's Eve

Our dear friend (and Scotsman!) Jack Wright recently bought a little getaway house in upstate New York (about 90 miles northwest of NYC). He invited about 20 or so of us up to bring in the New Year in his in-the-process-of-being-renovated new home!

jack w, lorelei, tyler
Lorelei, our lovely host Jack (yes, he is wearing a blue and green plaid jacket) and Tyler.
jack w ˆ lorelei ˆ tyler
me, sean, tyler
Tyler, Me and Sean work on our goodbye to 2001, Buddy-style.
me ˆ sean ˆ tyler
grant, hannah, sean
Grant, Hannah and Sean.
grant ˆ hannah ˆ sean
grant, jack w
So about an hour before midnight, the house's heater stopped working...and considering it was about 8 degrees outside the temperature in the house immediately began to plummet. As Jack (yep, the one with the plaid ass) opened the trapdoor into the basement (Evil Dead Style, yo) we all began to take, um, advantage of his situation.
lick ˆ man ass ˆ grant ˆ jack w
jack w, me
Bringing in 2002 with a bang, bay-bee!
gay ˆ jack w ˆ me
13 seconds left...
new years eve ˆ tv
grant, hannah, lorelei, me, nina
HAP-PY NEW YEAR! (Grant, Nina, Lo, Hannah and me).
best ˆ new years eve ˆ grant ˆ hannah ˆ lorelei ˆ me ˆ nina
emma, me
Me giving Emma a New Year's smooch
kiss ˆ new years eve ˆ emma ˆ me
tyler
Tyler can fly.
carry ˆ tyler
"Hey, thish isch a fuggin' *HIC* guh-reat, party...*BURP*," Peter said right before he ended up passing out in the backroom no more than 45 minutes into a brand new year. Lightweight.
drunk
emma, hannah
The Taylor sisters were starting to get grouchy...
sad ˆ emma ˆ hannah
emma, grant, hannah
...until Grant gave up a little ass to brighten their night!
grab ass ˆ man ass ˆ emma ˆ grant ˆ hannah
tyler
Let me ask you sumptin, how real do Tyler's fake titties look? We made these crazy-ass real-looking boobs by taking yellow balloons and adding red M&M's for nipples. (Is it wrong that this picture sorta gives me a chubby?)
best ˆ boobs ˆ tyler
tyler
At one point in the night, Tyler declared Jihad on Budweiser. Oy vey.
best ˆ mask ˆ tyler

The Morning After...

joey, lorelei
Sometime in the middle of the night, Jack's furnace stopped running and when we woke up in the morning, some ice cubes that had been dropped on the floor earlier in the night still hadn't melted. That's how fucking cold it was when we woke up.
bed ˆ joey ˆ lorelei
hannah, jack w
Can you imagine starting off a brand new year waking up next to that? Hannah tries to cover her face in shame.
bed ˆ hannah ˆ jack w
grant
Grant was showing off his eyelid-hickey that a drunken Lorelei had administered in the midst of the previous evening's festivities.
hickey ˆ grant
grant
He was also showing off this fucking sweet outfit! A "USA" sweatshirt, Purple Camo pants, and striped, toe-fitted socks that make it look like he has Muppet feet. We bet him $10 that he didn't have the balls to wear it to go out to breakfast at the local redneck diner (and we were right).

But he almost got his ass kicked at said diner anyway! Check it: So we're in the middle of eating our meal, and the really, grizzled couple in their late forties walks into the diner. The guy is a huge, lumberjack-looking biker-type guy and his lady's wearing sunglasses indoors and has bleached-blond hair that's been permed into a frazzled mess...and she bears a striking resemblance to Sammy Hagar!

As their walking past our table, Grant stands up and goes "Ladies and Gentlmen....SAMMY HAGAR!" I grabbed his arm and pulled him down and hissed "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, DUDE? THAT GUY WILL RIP YOUR ARMS OFF!" Grant was like, "Relax, they don't know who Sammy Hagar is..." and then he trailed off mid-sentence when he realized that he was pretty much in the midst of the region that was pretty much responsible for Van Halen's post-Lee-Roth success and shuddered when he realized how close he'd just come receiving a Happy New Year's Ass-Kicking!
sassy ˆ socks ˆ grant