October 30, 2003

European Vacation Part 18: Leaving Crete.

Thursday morning we work up early, packed up all of bags, and walked outside into winds of near-hurricane proportions. We had heard that Crete could get windy in the late fall, but this was beyond anything we'd imagined. We packed up the car and headed to the airport wondering if we'd be able to even take off (you hoser, eh?). Sorry, that one was for all the Canadian readers out there.

chris a, fatty, grant, me — We bid our lovely condo a fond farewell and piled into our sweet, lil' rental one last time.

Bye-bye turquoise water *sniffle*

fatty, grant — Check it out: both Grant and Fatty are "handling their luggage."

chris a, fatty, grant, me — Once in the airport, we grabbed a quick slice...

...and boarded our Athens-bound plane. By the way, as we were walking across the tarmac and I was taking out my camera to take this pic - Here's Grant's one-sided conversation to me: "Dude, what are you doing? Don't take a picture. Dude, seriously. Put your camera away. They're going to think you're a terrorist, dude. Think about it, who takes pictures of planes up close like this? Terrorists, that's who! You think I'm kidding? I'm not. Hey, stop laughing. What? What? Stop it. STOP LAUGHING. Seriously. Stop, dude. Stop. STOP! Oh, you little bitch. That's fine just keep on taking pictures and laughing. We'll see who laughing when you're arrested for being a SUSPECTED TERRORIST." (Stomps off in a huff). Heheh.

chris a, grant, me — Despite all of my SUSPICIOUS CAMERA ACTIVITY I somehow managed to make it aboard the plane. Wait, where's the Fatty?

fatty — Oh, conked the fuck already. That's where.

(Update: Ok, in Grant's defense I have to post something from an email he just sent clarifying why he was worried about the whole plane thing. Turns out he wasn't worried that I'd be mistaken for a a terrorist, he was worried that they were going to think I was a spy. In his email he included a link to story on the BBC news website about 14 "planespotters," people that take pictures of airplanes as a hobby, that were just convicted of "espionage" after being arrested for taking pictures of Greek military planes during an airshow there. Ka-ka-kuh-razy! Good looking out, Grizza. Sorry.)

After landing in Athens, we had a few hours to kill at the airport before our flight to Heathrow. When we got hungry an hour or two in, we couldn't find restaurants that looked good and in the end decided to go to McDonalds. At first we were bummed - we're in a foreign country and we're forced to eat something patently American. But then we took a closer look at the menu and discovered...

chris a — The GREEK MAC! That's right. Two lamb patties in a pita with lettuce, tomato and tahini. After the initial surprise of the Greek Mac wore off...

chris a — ...Chris managed to regain his composure and display his Greek Mac like a true Greek MACK. Awwww, yeah.

Ooooooooh!

grant — The Grizza takes a skeptical bite...

The verdict? It gets an enthusiastic, lambtastic thumbs up. Mmmmm.

The Greek authenticity of McDonald's inspired us to check out the airport's small museum of Greek art.

chris a — Holy shit. Does this photo even need a caption? Hahahaha.

Here's the not-so-great sneaky photo I tried to take of Grant freaking the fuck out when he thought he'd lost his plane ticket (which Chris had actually taken out of his bag and hidden while Grant was in the bathroom). After a few England-bound hours in the air, it was time for ANOTHER MEAL! Wooooo! Who loves airline food more than us?

fatty, grant, me — After a few England-bound hours in the air, it was time for ANOTHER MEAL! Wooooo! Who loves airline food more than us?

NO ONE! That's who.

chris a, fatty, grant — After a long-ass day of traveling and layovers, we landed in Heathrow a little past 11pm local time.

grant — Grant hopped on the "red phone" and ordered us up a car. We claimed our bags and prepared to head to (DRUMROLL)....

grant, me — ...ESSEX! That's right! We were heading out to Grant's parent's house in Essex to hang with his family and so he could show us around Corringham, the town he spend his formative years in.

grant — After a 90-minute, white-knuckled drive in the rain (on the wrong side of the road)...

chris a, fatty, grant, me — ...we arrived safely and without incident (save a slight yelling match between Grant and the rest of the passengers in the car who politely asked him if he would "SLOW THE FUCK DOWN SO DON'T HYDROPLANE OFF THE ROAD AND DIE FOR FUCK'S SAKE!") at Grant's parent's home and celebrated with some stiff drinks...

...and authentic English snacks! An assortment of cured meats and English crumpets (which are basically taste like if you took a Thomas' English Muffin and cubed its deliciousness).

fatty — Here's Fatty's "meat from three different animals with cheese" sandwich. He's going to put this pic up on JDate to subtly communicate to the ladies that he doesn't keep kosher. Bad Jew! Baaaad!

Remember all the way back in the beginning of the trip when Chris, Fatty and I were in Iceland and we had the "Guess what time the sun will rise" contest where the winner would get to sleep in Gemma's bed? Well, I won. None of us could figure out why Grant didn't freak out when we told him about what we'd said the prize was....until we discovered that Gemma had gone to Brazil with her boyfriend and wasn't even around! Here's me enjoying my winner's prize...and dreaming of Gemma alone in bed.

And to add insult to injury, Gemma's since gotten herself engaged. Boooo! Er, I mean congrats, Gemma!). We turned out the lights and tried to get some sleep in preparation for next day's whirlwind tour of the town and evening of Essex nightlife!