...which means BLAMO!, she's instantly asleep ten minutes later on the ride back north. My mom will get drunk from only a sniff of the barmaid's apron. Hahaha.
...and packed in the car to go to south Jersey for our annual Christmas Eve with my great uncle and aunt Walt and Ann (You know the drill by now, we do it every year (. Here's the backseat crizzew: me, mom and Brett's girlfriend Amy.
On the ride home we were glad to see that they finally installed a word of warning for any ladies that might be following us back to our place for a romp.
After I'd finished documenting our facial hair, we headed back to the house, showered (and I shaved, thank god), packed up and hit the road to head back down to Los Angeles (to attend the surprise birthday party that Jordana had put together for him. Shhhh!).
After food we went back to the ranch and relaxed. Then later that night we drove to the nearest theater (like 45 minutes away) to see the midnight showing of the third installment of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. (Bonus points to Grant for flipping the bird while pulling a Pomodoro Guy face! Noice!).
Saturday morning we woke up late and had to rush to get Charlene to LAX so she could catch her flight back to London. (She'd been up at the ranch visiting Grant for ten days prior to coming down to LA with him to meet me).
I was was waiting on the curb for a cab when a livery car pulled up and agreed to take me to JFK on the cheap (suh-weet!). This guy was a character, because he picked me up near Chinatown, he kept wanting to talk to me about Chinese people. He asked me "Hey, didja ever notice how Chinese ladies don't really have any butts?" Before I could answer, he launched into this story about how a relative of his worked for some jean company and when they wanted to sell their jeans in asia, they had to redesign them. "See, I'm not trying to be racist," he saw me laughing at his story, "I'm just trying to say that it's scientifically known...they have different butts!"
Thursday afternoon, I hopped in the car with my parents (minus little brother Brett, who lives out in Indiana and went to his girlfriend's parent's house in Ohio for Thanksgiving) and headed to my Aunt Elaine and Uncle Wayne's house in Clark, NJ.
...and headed for the nearby shore town of Leigh-on-Sea. (Beyond the lovely scenery, the best part of the trip was the Abott & Costello-esque conversation between Grant and the Fatty where Fatty thought the town was called "Leon's Sea.")
Prettier! After Grant gave up on trying to catch a peacock (we were actually rooting for him - we figured if he actually did manage to catch one, we'd be able to get some great shots of him getting the living shit pecked out of him), we hopped in the car and drove westward back to Rethymnon.
At one point, we were driving with the windows down laughing and talking and all of sudden a pack of (incredibly loud) motorcyles screamed past us doing well over 130 MPH. I managed to get my camera out in time to catch the tail end of the last rider as he sped past us.
The road we were traveling ran through the mountainous, northern coastline of the island. Out the left window all we could see were mountains with rows of olive trees haphazardly planted. Out the right window were more scraggly mountains that dropped off right into the sea.
Being that all the road signs were in Greek, we elected Chris to drive. We packed up the car, busted out the map, and started the 80 kilometer drive from Heraklion to Rethymnon.
6:40am (local time and still pitch black out). We spent the hour-long drive into Reykjavik betting on what time the sun would rise. Price Is Right rules in effect: the one who managed to come closest, without going over would be declared the winner. It was then agreed upon that the winner would get to make out with Gemma, Grant's hot little sister, (mmmmmm....Gemma) when we stopped at Grant's parent's house in Essex on the last leg of our trip. But then we all remembered that Gemma had a boyfriend. (Booooo).
When we got out of meeting we had some time to kill before we had to head back to the airport and I remember that my good friend (and former ModemMedia co-worker) John McHale lives in Atlanta. I called him and found out that he his work was just a few blocks away from where we were calling from. He hopped in his car and five short minutes later, Johnny was on the spot.
After finishing the entire CONQUISTIDOR, I made the mistake of thinking that it would be a good idea to get dessert. Just my suggestion made everyone else start burping. But then when I saw there was a Cinnabon place, I couldn't resist. I ended up getting a large Cinnabon and a hot chocolate, thinking that we could all share it. Everyone else was too full to even touch the Cinnabon - so I just ate the whole thing (whoops!).
Oh my god - I don't think I've ever been so full in my life. I overate to such a degree that I actually broke into a sweat (My stomach was quickly beginning to understand why my dinner was called "The Conquistidor"). I spend the car ride home trying not to throw up everytime Nina's car hit a bump in the road.
We hopped in Fatty's Probe and headed to Newport to meet up with the rest of the crew. (Frank drove in solo from NYC, Colin drove in solo from visiting his parents in CT, and Seth was coming in the next afternoon from Boston).
After breakfast we said our goodbye and hopped in our respective rides. Colin, shown here in his Ford Focus SVT (only 7,000 made yaknow!), headed back to Brooklyn solo and Seth headed back up to Boston solo. Grant, Frank, Fatty and myself decided we were going to go back to Manhattan and see "American Wedding." We split up into two cars (me with Fatty, Grant with Frank) and decided we'd have a race back to NYC. First team to make it to the movie theater wins. Aw, yeah.
I was trying to take a video of us rocking out but took a picture instead and managed to capture us in the midst of some pretty serious MetalFaces (check out Fatty pretending to play kit in the background with his DrummerFAce in full effect. Hahaha).
This photo's called "Taking A Picture While Driving a Motorcycle." Make sure you spend some time appreciating it as it almost cost me my life to take it.