We had given it our best shot and failed. So instead of hunting high school buddies we decided to get drunk and take silly photos. Check out Kim's impression of Sebastian Bach from Skid Row. Nice!
Immediately upon entering the bar we ran into the Wilcheck sister (Joslyn & Adrian). We thought we'd hit the RHS jackpot for sure, but The Barn turned out to be...
We started the hunt at Chi-Chi's Mexican Restaurant (whose bar is apparently, according to our sources, a hot bed of drunken RHS alumni activity). L to R: Jess, Me, Kim and Evani. There wasn't anybody we recognized upon our arrival...but halfway through our first beer...
Yeah, I know. I fit right in. The only thing I can say in my defense is that this photo was taken way out of context. I wasn't making a Backstreet Boy Face on purpose! In fact, if you look at the original photo from which this headshot was taken you'll see that my expression is actually a....
So instead of talking to him, we decided it would probably be more fun to capture him on film looking creepy and then posting his creepy-ass self up on the internet for everyone to see. Here's attempt number 1. You can kind of see his creepy face over the right-hand side of my head.
Deb and Jen smile while I cast a discerning look in the direction of the creepy guy in the background. This guy stood amonst our group by himself silently glaring at us for over 3 hours without saying a word. We were going to ask him what was up but decided against it because we thought we might just start cutting us up.
I knew the competition to earn a slot dancing for the night would be fierce, so I quickly busted out my Photoshop skillz and whipped up two tasty fliers advertising our masculinity that I knew would tantalize those Cake minxes. Here's the first image I sent along...
Look, my clothes aren't even off yet and all the ladies've got their money ready! Aw yeah, boyee. (Too bad they all put their money away once I started getting naked...).
...and when that didn't get an immediate response, I upped the ante with "beefcake" version (check out Grant's sassy, coy lil' smile! Tee-hee!) ...and SHA-POW! It worked. Grant and I got the green light: we were going to become male strippers.
Our Nerve co-workers Em & Lo were right in the front row and were supposed to immortalize our maiden strip performance on film for my photo album, but according to Lo, "We got so excited when you two came out that we were so busy yelling and screaming with our arms up in the air that we forgot to take photos."
At one point in the night, Grant and I gave dirty lap dances to Em & Lo up on stage in front of everyone. (Check out Emma trying to escape my grasp! Hahahaha).
We returned to the safety of the Nerve offices the next day only to receive a standing ovation upon our entrance. We had returned from the land of crazed girls with our egos intact and a fistful of cash taboot. Thanks Cake!
Magnum Motherfucking P.I.! (P.I. = Pimped Investigator, bee-eye-atch!) This shot was taken at my place right before we left for the party. I chose to pose in front of the Hawaiian mural that covers that back wall of our Tikki Living Room.
Grant, dressed up as Pan (the horny god of Baccanalia, appropriately enough) and Nina dressed up as a wood-nymph (they were supposed to be from a Midnight Summer's Dream).
Me with Viola as a Fembot. (Sweet Jesus.) You know, I would normally think that any girl who dressed up in an Austin Powers-related costume in the year 2001 was corny. But for some reason, I thought Viola pulled it off.
I ran over to them and kept trying to flatter one of the drunk ladies into letting me take her picture. I kept telling her "C'mon, it'll be so pretty." This photo is the result of me chasing her around and trying to get her in the frame. (Note my eye on the left). She was dying to dig into her freshly bought 16oz Bud Pounder (with a straw, no less. ROCK!)
Okay, so I'm chilling in the beer room getting a drink (remeber, this is college and most of the kids aren't old enough to drink, bless their little hearts, so there was a whole room set aside for all the "older" kids), and this incredibly hot, scantily-clad, girl comes up to me and just starts freaking my shit. I don't think I've ever smiled that big in my life.
Underneath our "Greaser Jeans," all the T-Bird boyz were wearing matching, red, 50's-era, Banana-Hammock style bathing suits. We cooked up a boys VS girls sing-a-long routine to "Summer Lovin" and halfway through the routine, we all dropped our pants and wowed the judges with our matching marble sacks (and our manly physiques).
Some nice gentleman sold us a giant, hand-rolled cigarette that made us feel all funny. The only thing I can figure is that we had some bizarre allergic reaction to the Danish tobacco.
